While settling into my not so new environment I’ve made a couple of acquaintances. I call them that because it’s only interaction through a known secondhand party by both. I also have made some contacts on my own.To date, those aren’t as impressive as the secondhand acquaintances. While not believing in any sort of love or companionship I have been able to be conscious free these past couple of months, only engaging in dating here and flirting there. Neither shares any type of goal but both just happen to be done very well. Being true to myself I hang out with whomever I like whenever I want and I don’t have to be bothered with the latter if not need be. That said, there has been a lack of motivation on my part this entire month. Since I’m not aiming for a goal I don’t see reason in exerting any energy in attempts of uncertain, uninsured random acts of excitement – I.e. FUN.

This past week I did resume my socialite status for a short time. Time

Hotel has a posh lounge area on the 2nd floor. It hosted a party for an acquaintance who just happens to be the DJ for the nonprofit I work with. I arrived early enough to get a feel for the place so once the party jumped off I had the advantage of time. The place was full of Greeks, by mid state they were all barking and forming the legendary hand symbols while posing for pictures. The crowd was nice and light, full of young (but still older than me, black professionals. Networking was in full swing and I was thankful to be able to foresee a random “holla.” Believe me when I say none were worthwhile…. Not worthwhile in the way that I’m not looking for anyway ;). Its becoming disappointing to not even accidentally see a 10 of a man to full of himself that I’d be interested in anyway. There’s never anything wrong in looking. Just as long as you keep it realistic, anyway. To not chalk the entire night as a loss I was amused by some if the guys “pick up” lines. I snickered and had some fun with a few of them but that was all.

After a not really mentionable date on Friday that involved desserts I couldn’t name or place Sunday deemed to be surprising. Meeting up with a friend for dinner who was meeting a friend that came into town for the weekend wasn’t planned. Neither was the venture into the City’s Meat Packing District. After a meal of hearty crab legs; myself, a friend and a Kansas City chief linebacker made our way to “PM.” There we met up with an industry buddy who holds an executive title at BET. His self could be called a friend…As he is apart of the nonprofit I help organize. We were arranged at a table more for viewing than drinking but bottle service was set up anyway although I ordered glasses of merlot instead of opting for the $300 bottle of brown XO glistening on the table. After all – I had to work in the morning. That’s not to assume I regretted the Patron I had shot with the linebacker before the night had officially began.

A good time was had and entertaining the out of town athlete wasn’t trying at all. Mr. BET who I must say is easy on the eyes and heavy with his smile made himself forever in my presents. However it was done – hekissed me or I kissed him briefly. We always had flirted but that’s as I do with any person worth flirting with. He said “thank you” stepped back and gazed at me and stated “you really made my night” of course this was funny to me. Not that it was my business to kiss random acquaintances but perhaps this meant more to him than to me? Could it be that the roles where switched sometime during the night? Surely I hadn’t become and type of aggressor nor had I unleashed anything I had been hiding for a time. It just happened, and rightfully so. Neither of us were attached to anything. And in the moment we both did as we pleased. As time passed I tried to avoid so much general contact with him because I wasn’t sure if I had trespassed on some uncommon ground that acquaintances shared. Really I could have hung out with him all night – but that’s not an uncommon situation when there are situations that the two of us are involved in. Later, he casually found him self back in the exact spot the accidental altercation had ensued. I smiled at him as he said “I’m ready for another kiss”. I’m drinking (but really not so much – IT’S A WORK NIGHT), so of course it’s a rational choice to succumb to this well dressed, gorgeous mans request. He was serious, he suggested the balcony away from the glazed over gazes of so many ready to spew hate.

I met him up the stairs and sashayed right into a long, hard steamy kiss. Much better and much longer than the first, both were equally impressed. Aside from the obvious I felt ridiculous for experiencing something so lusty in public. But I liked it and he wouldn’t stop. He asked for dinner on Friday. In the moment, I accepted. At the end of the otherwise non-mentionable night he kissed me on the cheek and told me to give him a call tomorrow. In my head I’m like “RIGHT!”

The only hitch to my day on Monday was confirmation that the Kansas City Chief was interested … this even after he told us his woes of his child’s mother and countless tramps and random women he encounters. I got a text message as I left work. It was from Mr. BET “can stop thinking about your lips, cant wait until Friday” I closed my phone quick – he wasn’t supposed to remember. He wasn’t supposed to remember because it wasn’t supposed to happen because none of it means anything. That’s what continued running through my head. I didn’t even know how to reply. This isn’t what drama feels like but it IS what confliction feels like. What exactly is the problem? He’s gorgeous and successful? At this point the only thing I’m sure of is – he’ll be gone by next week. Once I got home I sat down to think of a reply … before I even began the phone rang. We spoke for three hours.